Anything Goes; Illustrated – by Cole Porter

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Ray Hahn

Anything Goes; Illustrated

by Cole Porter

Cole Porter

Times have changed And we’ve often rewound the clock Since the Puritans got the shock When they landed on Plymouth Rock

Plymouth Rock
If today Any shock they should try to stem ‘Stead of landing on Plymouth Rock Plymouth Rock would land on them In olden days, a glimpse of stocking Was looked on as something shocking But now, God knows Anything goes Good authors, too, who once knew better words Now only use four-letter words Writing prose Anything goes If driving fast cars you like If low bars you like If old hymns you like If bare limbs you like If Mae West you like Or me undressed you like Why, nobody will oppose
Mae West
When ev’ry night the set that’s smart is Intruding at nudist parties In studios Anything goes
Mrs. Ned McLean
When Missus Ned McLean (God bless her) Can get Russian reds to “yes” her Then I suppose Anything goes When Rockefeller still can hoard enough money to let Max Gordon Produce his shows Anything goes
Max Gordon
The world has gone mad today And good’s bad today And black’s white today And day’s night today And that gent today You gave a cent today Once had several chateaus When folks who still can ride in jitneys Find out Vanderbilts and Whitneys Lack baby clothes Anything goes
Sam Goldwyn
When Sam Goldwyn can with great conviction Instruct Anna Sten in diction Then ‘Anna’ shows Anything goes
Anna Sten
When you hear that Lady Mendl standing up Now does a handspring landing up- On her toes Anything goes
Lady Mendl
Just think of those shocks you’ve got And those knocks you’ve got And those blues you’ve got From those news you’ve got And those pains you’ve got (If any brains you’ve got) From those little radios
So Missus R., with all her trimmings Can broadcast a bed from Simmons Cause Franklin knows Anything goes Click Below to Listen to Anything Goes
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Never knew there were so many contemporary references. Just goes to show our forefathers were smart and gossipy like us.

I thank you for the work you do. It is most certainly appreciated.

What a hoot. Great accompanying images suggesting once again, you can find anything on postcards (and other ephemera).

A great song. It’s wonderful (to borrow a phrase from George and Ira Gershwin) how you were able to find postcards to illustrate it. The first time I heard this version I had to do some digging to find out who was Lady Mendl (a prominent American actress and later interior designer). She was an early practitioner of yoga in the U.S. hence the references by Porter.

This was creative, and beyond good! It was delightful. Thanks Ray Hahn for putting it together!

Evelyn Walsh (Mrs. Ned) McLean was a mining heiress and socialite who once owned the Hope Diamond. Max Gordon’s successes included the original stage production of The Jazz Singer and the Broadway play Born Yesterday. I wonder what Porter would think of some of the fashions and explicit lyrics of today.

Completely impressive and most entertaining article. Thank you so much for this very clever feature!

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